The most ordinary of days belong to beauty. The semi-warm summer days. The partly cloudy skies. Doing errands. looking outside and hearing the same birds chirping or cawing. It's ordinary.
Ordinary things bump into ordinary things and depending on how the light hits them, we can see how amazing existence really is. We ignore it so often that life is dull. Our silver infused days become lackluster and just a piece of the junk we deal with, not the craft we weave and hammer and dance into being. I love my ordinary day. I love the way the blinds make the light flicker on the curtains.
Such a small little thought can change so much the way of the world. Simplicity, like a mountain stream, carves more deeply than shallow handholds of scoffing words. For this, I am thankful.
Blessings,
Grey
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Cut the ties that bind
Steady schedule online time: Get online. Turn on Yahoo messenger. Click Firefox. Type in 'www.' and scroll down one to Facebook. Click on Facebook. Click on inbox. Click another empty tab. Click on yahoo and check e-mail. Click on Facebook tab. Click on home. Scroll, respond, scroll, respond, scroll 'like', scroll respond. Click on Profile. Click on updates to catch those I may have missed. Click on events. Click 'maybe'. Click on PEER group. Find interesting links to post. Update PEER status message. Update personal status message. Research. Add link. Someone pops on fb chat. Talk. Curse fb chat. Switch to Yahoo messenger. Click click click...
When did I become a fb junkie? I stopped doing Farmville and Restaurant City a long time ago. The only ap. I touch is tetris... and... well it's just tetris. Even in the middle of the night, there's better things to do. When did I stop writing? When did I stop doing what I want to do? I felt a compulsion (yes, I have a bit of undiagnosed OCD tendencies). I have to be on top of everything. Be aware... Control freak? *nods and raises her hand* Facebook is a great way to be connected. Connect to your friends. Connect to your events. Instant gratification via the internet. *coughs* Well... you know what I mean.
It's good to give yourself a vacation. From work. Sure. From people. Yup. From Facebook. *nods* Sometimes your energy can be placed somewhere... less-than-premium. You can't always go to the beach and get away, but you can say "I'm going to take back two hours of my schedule today and do something different with it." Re-investing my time with something else. 14 hours/week of walks, play, joy, coffee dates, writing and maybe... just maybe meditation. Nah, I'm not going to stay offline, or even away from Facebook forever. I just need a break. And some reflection.
Analyze your whole self and you can see what you cannot while existing as a reactionary person. I can see this problem in other people... and told them many times "take care of yourself first." I need my own medicine and damn it... I'm taking it. What spurred this thought was a strange thing actually. Having nothing to do with fb. Someone accused me of not showing discretion concerning a magically oriented group. I realized my reaction was intense. Who me? I am the pillar of tact! Moreso, she reminded me that the group was a men's only group and no women were allowed so I needed to mind my own business and really you should have known and I'm telling you this because other people think the same way and by the way love and light. (mind you I've been attending their open meetings for the past 10 months regularly) She's making a mountain out of a mole hill... and selling shit with a touch of sugar at the end. *chuckles* It made me laugh at first. Then maybe it was the hormones, maybe it was because I just finished a four hour reading for someone... but I reacted strongly. I got very angry. I don't get angry like that. So, anything that helps me reflect on who I am and how I react and my motivations helps me. I don't like it, but I'm glad that this happened.
Even though I don't care what a lot of people think, I care what my friends think. Especially if I do something that offends them. I want to be aware of what they think and how they feel... so when I was challenged for crossing a line by being involved in a men's spirituality group... I suddenly worried. I worried I was not being respectful. That I had broken the integrity of my honor system. That somehow I missed it.
That's what bothered me the most. That I missed it... I missed the imaginary tactful tap tap taps that someone sends out saying I'm going too far. That I'm infringing on them. That I was being disrespectful. That is what got me angry. And that was a sign I needed to step back from the situation.
And so I did. I'm going to use all of the energy that I would in responding to her, all of the energy I have placed in fb and turning it inward. I'm going to pamper my Self. And yes, I did miss it. I missed the fact that I care too much about stuff that doesn't really matter. I must let go... and enjoy the ride.
Blessings,
Greymentality
When did I become a fb junkie? I stopped doing Farmville and Restaurant City a long time ago. The only ap. I touch is tetris... and... well it's just tetris. Even in the middle of the night, there's better things to do. When did I stop writing? When did I stop doing what I want to do? I felt a compulsion (yes, I have a bit of undiagnosed OCD tendencies). I have to be on top of everything. Be aware... Control freak? *nods and raises her hand* Facebook is a great way to be connected. Connect to your friends. Connect to your events. Instant gratification via the internet. *coughs* Well... you know what I mean.
It's good to give yourself a vacation. From work. Sure. From people. Yup. From Facebook. *nods* Sometimes your energy can be placed somewhere... less-than-premium. You can't always go to the beach and get away, but you can say "I'm going to take back two hours of my schedule today and do something different with it." Re-investing my time with something else. 14 hours/week of walks, play, joy, coffee dates, writing and maybe... just maybe meditation. Nah, I'm not going to stay offline, or even away from Facebook forever. I just need a break. And some reflection.
Analyze your whole self and you can see what you cannot while existing as a reactionary person. I can see this problem in other people... and told them many times "take care of yourself first." I need my own medicine and damn it... I'm taking it. What spurred this thought was a strange thing actually. Having nothing to do with fb. Someone accused me of not showing discretion concerning a magically oriented group. I realized my reaction was intense. Who me? I am the pillar of tact! Moreso, she reminded me that the group was a men's only group and no women were allowed so I needed to mind my own business and really you should have known and I'm telling you this because other people think the same way and by the way love and light. (mind you I've been attending their open meetings for the past 10 months regularly) She's making a mountain out of a mole hill... and selling shit with a touch of sugar at the end. *chuckles* It made me laugh at first. Then maybe it was the hormones, maybe it was because I just finished a four hour reading for someone... but I reacted strongly. I got very angry. I don't get angry like that. So, anything that helps me reflect on who I am and how I react and my motivations helps me. I don't like it, but I'm glad that this happened.
Even though I don't care what a lot of people think, I care what my friends think. Especially if I do something that offends them. I want to be aware of what they think and how they feel... so when I was challenged for crossing a line by being involved in a men's spirituality group... I suddenly worried. I worried I was not being respectful. That I had broken the integrity of my honor system. That somehow I missed it.
That's what bothered me the most. That I missed it... I missed the imaginary tactful tap tap taps that someone sends out saying I'm going too far. That I'm infringing on them. That I was being disrespectful. That is what got me angry. And that was a sign I needed to step back from the situation.
And so I did. I'm going to use all of the energy that I would in responding to her, all of the energy I have placed in fb and turning it inward. I'm going to pamper my Self. And yes, I did miss it. I missed the fact that I care too much about stuff that doesn't really matter. I must let go... and enjoy the ride.
Blessings,
Greymentality
Monday, July 19, 2010
What's in a title?
Well, I've had a discussion with my mother not too long ago. I realized it was time for me to use her preconceived notions and thoughts on the word Witch to my benefit. I decided to dethrone that term in my house with my mother. Since her definition will always include a nauseated ick feeling, I am reclaiming my 'title' as energy practitioner. Yes, I know. Titles are only as important as you make them. Yet if using them with others, they can be quite powerful.
About seven years ago I told my mother I could see 'auras.' About six years ago I told her I could see 'spirits/ghosts.' About five years ago I told her I could see the future. And then, I told her I was a Witch. Crash, boom, bam, collapse! My gentle crafting of understanding... or at least setting a stage to understanding... crashed under the weight of that word. I defined it. I explained it. And, yet... who'd a thunk that someone's thought process could crush my long balanced plan? Oh yes... something about the power of thought... and belief... Anyway... Before my mother wanted me to be a 'psychic.' It's so much easier to understand and even easier to explain to your family friends. However the term psychic seems to denotes that it is just innate abilities and gifts instead of hard work and practice. So, I threw that out the window as I didn't like the way it felt on my person. So, I chose a little over 11 years ago the term Witch. It was somewhat vague. Had a good connotation in my mind. It meant a person who practices magic and spellcraft. Poof. Yay. There ya go. I used it with people who understood the word at least somewhat correlating with my understanding. It worked (and still does to some degree).
When I was having one of those moments not too long ago about cutting up my illusion on life... shredding it out and breathing in the new skin of existence (gotta have those every once in a while)... I decided. Why the hell do I need that word? Yes, it means something to me. Yes it's easier when going around the circle explaining your beliefs just to say "Witch." But, perhaps by claiming that word I've become lazy. It's so much easier to just reclaim a word... or so I thought. Think about reclaimed wood. Sometimes it's at the bottom of a lake. Isn't it easier just to cut down a new piece of lumber instead of getting on a dive suit, scouting out murky waters, finding your treasure, going back up, waving someone over with the crane/boat, going back down in the water and hooking it up praying that the chains don't damage your find and that it will be worth it in the end. For those who like reclaimed wood. Yes. It is very worth it. It has a beauty that a brand new treated timber doesn't have. It has age. It has experience. It has a new life. Oh, and it's a green solution. And... it costs more.
Though the shift of understanding of the world Witch has increased dramatically over the last 20 years, at least concerning New Age practices, it still has hundreds of years of connotation that goes along with it. Are you really a healer in your community birthing babies and making love spells for two chickens and a hat? Are you someone who makes talismans out of hair, fingernails and iron? Are you an enemy to the church? Are you someone to be feared? Are you a hermit in the woods luring children into your oven with sweets and delectable treats? Do you curse men who have an ego to become the beasts they truly are? Do you hear the voice of God as you lead men into battle? I mean... there's a lot of things added to this word.
...and I have to say, some of it works for me. In the spirit of efficiency, however, I'd have to say it is easier to put forth my energy to explain this. "I'm an energy practitioner." Most people would say "Oh, what's that?" or "How do you mean?" (at least if they're curious) Then I can send my impression of what it means into their mind by the magic of words. I can use my associations with that title and create a new neural path in their minds... ok yes, they're doing the work for me... but still... It's easier. And maybe I am a little lazy, but I have more important things to worry about than what others think about me. Like, is the milk really out of date two days after the expiration date or when do I need to sign up for that class or hell... LIFE IS TOO IMPORTANT TO GET STUCK INSIDE IT. Pardon.. felt like yelling. :) But truth often does that. Yells and screams and stabs you in your eye. It's only your own fault if you can't feel it or hear it.
So, I learned a lot from my mother. How to make a great chili. How to refinish a house. But, this most of all. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. But sometimes... the pound of cure is necessary.
Blessings you crazy people,
Greymentality
About seven years ago I told my mother I could see 'auras.' About six years ago I told her I could see 'spirits/ghosts.' About five years ago I told her I could see the future. And then, I told her I was a Witch. Crash, boom, bam, collapse! My gentle crafting of understanding... or at least setting a stage to understanding... crashed under the weight of that word. I defined it. I explained it. And, yet... who'd a thunk that someone's thought process could crush my long balanced plan? Oh yes... something about the power of thought... and belief... Anyway... Before my mother wanted me to be a 'psychic.' It's so much easier to understand and even easier to explain to your family friends. However the term psychic seems to denotes that it is just innate abilities and gifts instead of hard work and practice. So, I threw that out the window as I didn't like the way it felt on my person. So, I chose a little over 11 years ago the term Witch. It was somewhat vague. Had a good connotation in my mind. It meant a person who practices magic and spellcraft. Poof. Yay. There ya go. I used it with people who understood the word at least somewhat correlating with my understanding. It worked (and still does to some degree).
When I was having one of those moments not too long ago about cutting up my illusion on life... shredding it out and breathing in the new skin of existence (gotta have those every once in a while)... I decided. Why the hell do I need that word? Yes, it means something to me. Yes it's easier when going around the circle explaining your beliefs just to say "Witch." But, perhaps by claiming that word I've become lazy. It's so much easier to just reclaim a word... or so I thought. Think about reclaimed wood. Sometimes it's at the bottom of a lake. Isn't it easier just to cut down a new piece of lumber instead of getting on a dive suit, scouting out murky waters, finding your treasure, going back up, waving someone over with the crane/boat, going back down in the water and hooking it up praying that the chains don't damage your find and that it will be worth it in the end. For those who like reclaimed wood. Yes. It is very worth it. It has a beauty that a brand new treated timber doesn't have. It has age. It has experience. It has a new life. Oh, and it's a green solution. And... it costs more.
Though the shift of understanding of the world Witch has increased dramatically over the last 20 years, at least concerning New Age practices, it still has hundreds of years of connotation that goes along with it. Are you really a healer in your community birthing babies and making love spells for two chickens and a hat? Are you someone who makes talismans out of hair, fingernails and iron? Are you an enemy to the church? Are you someone to be feared? Are you a hermit in the woods luring children into your oven with sweets and delectable treats? Do you curse men who have an ego to become the beasts they truly are? Do you hear the voice of God as you lead men into battle? I mean... there's a lot of things added to this word.
...and I have to say, some of it works for me. In the spirit of efficiency, however, I'd have to say it is easier to put forth my energy to explain this. "I'm an energy practitioner." Most people would say "Oh, what's that?" or "How do you mean?" (at least if they're curious) Then I can send my impression of what it means into their mind by the magic of words. I can use my associations with that title and create a new neural path in their minds... ok yes, they're doing the work for me... but still... It's easier. And maybe I am a little lazy, but I have more important things to worry about than what others think about me. Like, is the milk really out of date two days after the expiration date or when do I need to sign up for that class or hell... LIFE IS TOO IMPORTANT TO GET STUCK INSIDE IT. Pardon.. felt like yelling. :) But truth often does that. Yells and screams and stabs you in your eye. It's only your own fault if you can't feel it or hear it.
So, I learned a lot from my mother. How to make a great chili. How to refinish a house. But, this most of all. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. But sometimes... the pound of cure is necessary.
Blessings you crazy people,
Greymentality
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Stop making me laugh... You're making me hurt!
Perfect love. Perfect trust. Something associated with circles all over the country. Saying and doing are completely different things. A professional thing to remember when working with your coven members. It hits at the heart of working as a unit. It even helps the solo artist. Perfect love and perfect trust goes a long way when working alone. But, why is there so much freakin' drama? For instance...
Event 1: A fallout of a magical house. Emotional fireworks lead to drama as a member is cast out from the circle. Everyone is angry and wants everyone else to know their point of view and why theirs is closest to the truth.
Event 2: Misunderstanding among a solitary and someone who is a leader among local Pagan circles. Gossip surrounds the solitary practitioner and each feel like they must defend their position. People choose their side and wait for a moment when it really matters... the situation biding its time until the metaphorical fur flies.
Event 3: Two solitaries discuss emotional turmoil in their romantic relationships and share their thoughts with each other. As they do so they discover a vibrant connection energetically and realize that they would make great magical partners. One is willing to take a chance and proposition the other. The other is not willing to go that far, but acknowledges that facet. The dynamic of the two makes a promising working connection, yet the chemistry might be cause of an issue in the future.
Why do we do this? Why can't we just have a professional relationship with everyone else? Well... first off, probably because we're human. Second, it wouldn't be near as fun. Third, the only way to steer clear of drama of any sort is to not connect to anyone else and just be alone. Then, you have to deal with the drama of yourself. (Anyone seen Castaway?... yeah... tell me Wilson didn't invent drama after he was invented for that purpose...) Drama, in small doses is just social interaction. That is important in any social circles to help us reflect and challenge our views and practices. It's not a bad thing to choose sides. It's not a bad thing to challenge your morals. It's not a bad thing at all to have a struggle. How else will we learn?
When we focus on not letting go and holding on to the anger, the torment, the worry, the dramatic situations of the past... we build our foundation on sand.
After a time we become immune to the small doses of friction and tug-of-war. We want more. We want more violence to stoke our imagination. We want to hear the torture stories of someone coming out of a bad relationship. We want to observe pain from a safe distance and be the saviors... or maybe we are just sadists that don't have the heart to go through and hurt someone just for our pleasure so we seek out those already hurting and savor the stories... the hurt... just like watching a movie. Or maybe we wait till someone tells their story just for the chance to share your pain stories.
"After he beat me... I knew I had to leave."
"Oh that reminds me of when I was with Phil... he never hit me but he was a manipulator..."
Sharing stories can be a bonding experience. But, by reliving your past you take the chance of cutting open those old wounds and reveling in them. Masochist time! We think that by sharing our pain with the world it will make it go away. I don't know who started that idea... maybe therapists in the days of old... just to make a buck. "Go ahead, talk. It'll make you feel better."
You know, sometimes it does. It helps sort through things, but over a time... sharing over and over and over again, you repeat pain. You dampen your spirits. And darn it, I have had enough of that.
This is one of the reasons why I prefer to practice alone. People get in the way. So, I let them go. It's interesting... you notice the people who are actually interested in all of you when you let them be free to leave and not feed into their social addictions and predilections. They run through you like a sieve. It's sometimes better to not be noticed. But, if you are a figurehead for a group or a Lieutenant for a circle... sometimes the fur will fly and you'll have to catch it. Sometimes drama will hit you on your face like a warm piece of... pie. Then what do you do?
You handle it.
You let them yell. You let them scream. When they're tired enough, you respond and let them be on their way. You choose your battles. You stand your ground. Sometimes you just listen. But whatever you do... as a leader... whatever you do. Do not... under any circumstances... lose your sense of humor. :)
All of it. The agony. The he said/she said. The sickness of self... It is frakin' hilarious. Yes, be serious for a bit. Yes, hold the person and say things will work out. But you know, life's too short to live in a puddle and realize it's raining yellow. And if you do, laugh at it. Cause it's a joke. Life, with all its pleasures, experiences, sorrow, imagination, agony... it is, the Divine Punchline.
So, perhaps instead of jumping into the drama and choosing which colors to fight for... maybe a little giggle would be a better way to handle things. Hell, maybe an out and out cackle. I do a pretty mean one at that. ;)
Blessings people,
Greymentality
Event 1: A fallout of a magical house. Emotional fireworks lead to drama as a member is cast out from the circle. Everyone is angry and wants everyone else to know their point of view and why theirs is closest to the truth.
Event 2: Misunderstanding among a solitary and someone who is a leader among local Pagan circles. Gossip surrounds the solitary practitioner and each feel like they must defend their position. People choose their side and wait for a moment when it really matters... the situation biding its time until the metaphorical fur flies.
Event 3: Two solitaries discuss emotional turmoil in their romantic relationships and share their thoughts with each other. As they do so they discover a vibrant connection energetically and realize that they would make great magical partners. One is willing to take a chance and proposition the other. The other is not willing to go that far, but acknowledges that facet. The dynamic of the two makes a promising working connection, yet the chemistry might be cause of an issue in the future.
Why do we do this? Why can't we just have a professional relationship with everyone else? Well... first off, probably because we're human. Second, it wouldn't be near as fun. Third, the only way to steer clear of drama of any sort is to not connect to anyone else and just be alone. Then, you have to deal with the drama of yourself. (Anyone seen Castaway?... yeah... tell me Wilson didn't invent drama after he was invented for that purpose...) Drama, in small doses is just social interaction. That is important in any social circles to help us reflect and challenge our views and practices. It's not a bad thing to choose sides. It's not a bad thing to challenge your morals. It's not a bad thing at all to have a struggle. How else will we learn?
When we focus on not letting go and holding on to the anger, the torment, the worry, the dramatic situations of the past... we build our foundation on sand.
After a time we become immune to the small doses of friction and tug-of-war. We want more. We want more violence to stoke our imagination. We want to hear the torture stories of someone coming out of a bad relationship. We want to observe pain from a safe distance and be the saviors... or maybe we are just sadists that don't have the heart to go through and hurt someone just for our pleasure so we seek out those already hurting and savor the stories... the hurt... just like watching a movie. Or maybe we wait till someone tells their story just for the chance to share your pain stories.
"After he beat me... I knew I had to leave."
"Oh that reminds me of when I was with Phil... he never hit me but he was a manipulator..."
Sharing stories can be a bonding experience. But, by reliving your past you take the chance of cutting open those old wounds and reveling in them. Masochist time! We think that by sharing our pain with the world it will make it go away. I don't know who started that idea... maybe therapists in the days of old... just to make a buck. "Go ahead, talk. It'll make you feel better."
You know, sometimes it does. It helps sort through things, but over a time... sharing over and over and over again, you repeat pain. You dampen your spirits. And darn it, I have had enough of that.
This is one of the reasons why I prefer to practice alone. People get in the way. So, I let them go. It's interesting... you notice the people who are actually interested in all of you when you let them be free to leave and not feed into their social addictions and predilections. They run through you like a sieve. It's sometimes better to not be noticed. But, if you are a figurehead for a group or a Lieutenant for a circle... sometimes the fur will fly and you'll have to catch it. Sometimes drama will hit you on your face like a warm piece of... pie. Then what do you do?
You handle it.
You let them yell. You let them scream. When they're tired enough, you respond and let them be on their way. You choose your battles. You stand your ground. Sometimes you just listen. But whatever you do... as a leader... whatever you do. Do not... under any circumstances... lose your sense of humor. :)
All of it. The agony. The he said/she said. The sickness of self... It is frakin' hilarious. Yes, be serious for a bit. Yes, hold the person and say things will work out. But you know, life's too short to live in a puddle and realize it's raining yellow. And if you do, laugh at it. Cause it's a joke. Life, with all its pleasures, experiences, sorrow, imagination, agony... it is, the Divine Punchline.
So, perhaps instead of jumping into the drama and choosing which colors to fight for... maybe a little giggle would be a better way to handle things. Hell, maybe an out and out cackle. I do a pretty mean one at that. ;)
Blessings people,
Greymentality
Thursday, May 27, 2010
A working group
Not too long ago, I was able to have a good discussion on energy and perhaps having a good working group, or rather those who practice magic or energy work together. Anywho, a few nights ago, I was thinking on the fact that energies merge, mesh, mix when working with others. Like mixing colors on a pallet...or perhaps more like mixing the colors on a canvas to make a whole new organism... a whole new picture. For the past, I dunno... 8 years I haven't practiced regularly with more than one or two people at a time. Generally, I work alone. I've attended open circles and hosted them as well, but energy work and open circles... well... you just have to have a style that works with those sorts of energies. Me, I don't really enjoy 'calling quarters' or using athames or wands. My style is just different. I've been approached by some friends I've known for a very long time in hopes of actually starting a working group.
Each person has their own style and focus. Each person is unique, just like everybody else. (I had to say it... just had to. ^_^) The other night, we did an energy exercise aka playing with words. In this instance, it was a word association exercise. I say "cat", person 1 says "dog", person 2 says "fur" etc etc. While observing the energy exchange, I realized that certain energies can override and sway others strongly in that direction. For instance, sexual energy. It is, when people have a rapport with one another, contagious. If one person is highly focused on something so primal and instinctive, it sways the conversation to center over it. (it's hard to get your mind out of the gutter once people jump in with both feet) That energy can be used as a driving force or it can get in the way. That is something that must be considered when working closely with others. Also, some people project energy at a more intense rate while others are more mellow. Would that strength of focus or choice to express themselves so openly be a problem in the future? I'm thinking that ultimately that will to focus will be used as a positive thing, however it must be brought to light as an aspect of the individual and a facet of the group dynamic. When you work with others, you must use what you have. We are each others tools... so to speak. A synchronized dance of instinct, power, education, trust and love. Everyone is an ingredient. Like good gumbo. :) (can you tell I haven't had lunch yet?)
When choosing working partners, what is the most important? Similar interests? Similar goals? Similar styles? I think that overall there must be a degree of chemistry among the group. An ability to accept each others' idiosyncrasies yet still be able to call bulls***. To see each other by the light of moon and by the light of the sun. To see the hidden and to see the unveiled face of Self. Above all, work through problems and do not ignore them. When people ignore problems, they fester like a bed sore. I think that's a good piece of advice for life in general, but with a magical group, trust is something that is imperative and can be in danger depending on the problem at hand. What if someone makes someone feel uncomfortable? What if someone says something that hurts the feelings of another?
I've been spoiled. The person I practice the most with, we have such an open line of communication that even when we're angry or cranky... we talk or at least say we'll talk later due to our need of quiet time. Whatever the emotion or event... we know that we're here to help each other be it through listening, talking it out or agreeing to give each other space. Perhaps the most important part of any relationship is an open line of communication.
Well, that lunch isn't going to fix itself. :)
Blessings to you and yours,
Greymentality
Each person has their own style and focus. Each person is unique, just like everybody else. (I had to say it... just had to. ^_^) The other night, we did an energy exercise aka playing with words. In this instance, it was a word association exercise. I say "cat", person 1 says "dog", person 2 says "fur" etc etc. While observing the energy exchange, I realized that certain energies can override and sway others strongly in that direction. For instance, sexual energy. It is, when people have a rapport with one another, contagious. If one person is highly focused on something so primal and instinctive, it sways the conversation to center over it. (it's hard to get your mind out of the gutter once people jump in with both feet) That energy can be used as a driving force or it can get in the way. That is something that must be considered when working closely with others. Also, some people project energy at a more intense rate while others are more mellow. Would that strength of focus or choice to express themselves so openly be a problem in the future? I'm thinking that ultimately that will to focus will be used as a positive thing, however it must be brought to light as an aspect of the individual and a facet of the group dynamic. When you work with others, you must use what you have. We are each others tools... so to speak. A synchronized dance of instinct, power, education, trust and love. Everyone is an ingredient. Like good gumbo. :) (can you tell I haven't had lunch yet?)
When choosing working partners, what is the most important? Similar interests? Similar goals? Similar styles? I think that overall there must be a degree of chemistry among the group. An ability to accept each others' idiosyncrasies yet still be able to call bulls***. To see each other by the light of moon and by the light of the sun. To see the hidden and to see the unveiled face of Self. Above all, work through problems and do not ignore them. When people ignore problems, they fester like a bed sore. I think that's a good piece of advice for life in general, but with a magical group, trust is something that is imperative and can be in danger depending on the problem at hand. What if someone makes someone feel uncomfortable? What if someone says something that hurts the feelings of another?
I've been spoiled. The person I practice the most with, we have such an open line of communication that even when we're angry or cranky... we talk or at least say we'll talk later due to our need of quiet time. Whatever the emotion or event... we know that we're here to help each other be it through listening, talking it out or agreeing to give each other space. Perhaps the most important part of any relationship is an open line of communication.
Well, that lunch isn't going to fix itself. :)
Blessings to you and yours,
Greymentality
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Nothing too deep...
Lately I've been thinking a little differently. I've been having more moments where I don't want to deal with people, the public and anyone that puts on airs. For some reason, the blatant show of fake smiles and laughs make me annoyed. If someone laughs, I want to know that it means just that. Laughter. Something tickled them. Joy. I don't like hearing people laugh as a sound to fill the silence. I suppose laughter is something that has different sorts from the genuine to the hu-rumph.
I suppose I'm just tired of people lying to me with their presence. "How are you today?" "Fine." Lies! I know people are people, but sometimes I just have enough of the small talk and preludes to an actual conversation. It reminds me of a movie I heard of once. Invention of Lying. I've never seen it, but the idea is interesting. A world where no one can lie. Everyone tells exactly what they're thinking rude and all. But, one man invents lying. Interesting concept... Anyway... I've noticed lately I've been much happier just being home listening to the rain with the dogs. Maybe a vacation from people is in the cards. *shrug*
In other news, I've discovered the fun of Yoga, Hatha Vinyasa I believe it is called. Just been enjoying it. I've also been taking at least 2 long walks in the park every week. It's amazing how much you miss something when you don't do it... With the rain we've been having combined with such heat... it's been hard to get out there. I know my dog's been missing them. I guess I'm just very thankful and very motivated and oddly centered. Life is something I cannot ignore. Life is something of an adventure and... even though sometimes I don't want to see another human face or want to become a hermit part time... I am glad that the universe created me and I created my universe.
Enough contemplation right now... lets just listen to the rain...
Greymentality
I suppose I'm just tired of people lying to me with their presence. "How are you today?" "Fine." Lies! I know people are people, but sometimes I just have enough of the small talk and preludes to an actual conversation. It reminds me of a movie I heard of once. Invention of Lying. I've never seen it, but the idea is interesting. A world where no one can lie. Everyone tells exactly what they're thinking rude and all. But, one man invents lying. Interesting concept... Anyway... I've noticed lately I've been much happier just being home listening to the rain with the dogs. Maybe a vacation from people is in the cards. *shrug*
In other news, I've discovered the fun of Yoga, Hatha Vinyasa I believe it is called. Just been enjoying it. I've also been taking at least 2 long walks in the park every week. It's amazing how much you miss something when you don't do it... With the rain we've been having combined with such heat... it's been hard to get out there. I know my dog's been missing them. I guess I'm just very thankful and very motivated and oddly centered. Life is something I cannot ignore. Life is something of an adventure and... even though sometimes I don't want to see another human face or want to become a hermit part time... I am glad that the universe created me and I created my universe.
Enough contemplation right now... lets just listen to the rain...
Greymentality
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Sacred Innocence
What is more powerful, the imagination of a child or the wisdom of an Elder? Thinking on this, I pondered. Power is something that is given to oneself. Power is something experienced, but often chased after as something to attain. Innocence is generally something that is destroyed or colored as one ages and experiences life in all its pains, fears and sharp experiences. Innocence is something remembered, loved and cherished. It is also something overlooked.
Fleeting moments of laughter stitches. Momentary frolicking in a pile of hay. Reminiscing about tea parties with your own children as you sit as a member in a youth's theatrical imagination. Then, you have to stop laughing and go back to your paperwork. You have to clean up all those itchy strands of straw and feed the horses. You have to clean the tea set and pick up the boys from soccer practice. The life you've been living with adult needs and adult values takes over.
So, what is more powerful? Child or Sage? The imagination of a child is still not segmented into colors and shading of experience. The imagination of a child is actually experiencing how to organize their synaptic activity in a way they want. They start out reaching for dreams instead of postponing them. And what of the Sage. The Sage would have experienced quite a lot of life. Been a child. Been a mother/father (if not biologically, to others in their life). Seen death. Seen the ways of human nature and mother nature. The Sage Knows. Two iconic figures in life that bring a strong reaction. The young Maiden. The elder Crone. Yes, we are all knowledgeable of the young lady figure we see in the Triple Goddess statues. The vibrant maiden ripe as a peach and ready to begin her journey into womanhood. What off the child? What of the one that is fresh from birth and still able to sense the Before? The connection between Life and Death is close as well as a wisdom very similar to the Sage... an honest clear sense of Knowing.
So, I suppose that would be the Child Sage... quite similar to the childlike Buddha mentioned in the Osho Zen Tarot card "Awareness." The childlike Buddha appears after a cool fire burns the veil of illusion. The Child Sage is beyond illusion. So why do we see the innocent as naive or weak? It is because we know the many things in this world that will devour the innocent and tear it asunder. But, how can you render an idea? You can't, at least not very easily. The idea of innocence is something that lives on as each child is born. The potential of life, the exploration of the simple as well as complex matters of the mind, heart, spirit and surrounding environment. The innocence within may hide behind a shadow of fear or doubt... or even an active ignoring of said inner child. We know this because we live in the 'real world.' We don't all go frolicking around... but... neither does the inner child. There is a time for contemplation as well as rest and play. As much as we need an adult opinion and responsible nature, we need to allow ourselves to let loose our mind and spread imagination in new and inventive ways. We need to set aside stress and fears so that we may actually be able to enjoy life. That is, indeed, the innocent nature of humanity. The battery behind our exploratory nature is the pure light of the Child Sage, the untouched one. Though we use this battery to explore things of all sorts that color the light in shades of study, expression, motherhood, career, sexuality and things not normally associated with youth, it remains vitally bright and brilliant white like whitest wool before staining or the canvas beneath a portrait.
The innocence of self is important when your energy centers need filling. It is a sacred thing... a sacred state and something to be honored, not overlooked. The wisdom of the inner child is joy of the game of life. If you can appreciate this, then maybe you're not as far away from your Child Sage than previously thought.
Blessings to you and yours,
Greymentality
Fleeting moments of laughter stitches. Momentary frolicking in a pile of hay. Reminiscing about tea parties with your own children as you sit as a member in a youth's theatrical imagination. Then, you have to stop laughing and go back to your paperwork. You have to clean up all those itchy strands of straw and feed the horses. You have to clean the tea set and pick up the boys from soccer practice. The life you've been living with adult needs and adult values takes over.
So, what is more powerful? Child or Sage? The imagination of a child is still not segmented into colors and shading of experience. The imagination of a child is actually experiencing how to organize their synaptic activity in a way they want. They start out reaching for dreams instead of postponing them. And what of the Sage. The Sage would have experienced quite a lot of life. Been a child. Been a mother/father (if not biologically, to others in their life). Seen death. Seen the ways of human nature and mother nature. The Sage Knows. Two iconic figures in life that bring a strong reaction. The young Maiden. The elder Crone. Yes, we are all knowledgeable of the young lady figure we see in the Triple Goddess statues. The vibrant maiden ripe as a peach and ready to begin her journey into womanhood. What off the child? What of the one that is fresh from birth and still able to sense the Before? The connection between Life and Death is close as well as a wisdom very similar to the Sage... an honest clear sense of Knowing.
So, I suppose that would be the Child Sage... quite similar to the childlike Buddha mentioned in the Osho Zen Tarot card "Awareness." The childlike Buddha appears after a cool fire burns the veil of illusion. The Child Sage is beyond illusion. So why do we see the innocent as naive or weak? It is because we know the many things in this world that will devour the innocent and tear it asunder. But, how can you render an idea? You can't, at least not very easily. The idea of innocence is something that lives on as each child is born. The potential of life, the exploration of the simple as well as complex matters of the mind, heart, spirit and surrounding environment. The innocence within may hide behind a shadow of fear or doubt... or even an active ignoring of said inner child. We know this because we live in the 'real world.' We don't all go frolicking around... but... neither does the inner child. There is a time for contemplation as well as rest and play. As much as we need an adult opinion and responsible nature, we need to allow ourselves to let loose our mind and spread imagination in new and inventive ways. We need to set aside stress and fears so that we may actually be able to enjoy life. That is, indeed, the innocent nature of humanity. The battery behind our exploratory nature is the pure light of the Child Sage, the untouched one. Though we use this battery to explore things of all sorts that color the light in shades of study, expression, motherhood, career, sexuality and things not normally associated with youth, it remains vitally bright and brilliant white like whitest wool before staining or the canvas beneath a portrait.
The innocence of self is important when your energy centers need filling. It is a sacred thing... a sacred state and something to be honored, not overlooked. The wisdom of the inner child is joy of the game of life. If you can appreciate this, then maybe you're not as far away from your Child Sage than previously thought.
Blessings to you and yours,
Greymentality
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